supremely freaked out

Dr. Ross's secretary sent me a package with information about surgery. I was reading it as I was eating my lunch today, and now am, as the title of this post states, supremely freaked out.

I know that heart surgery is major, of course, but I never put thought into the specific details about what to expect as I recover. I just thought, I'm young and healthy, I will recover quickly.

Did you know that after heart surgery your breastbone may "click" sometimes? This is because it is healing after being broken, and it's rubbing together. Ewwwww!!! 

When I wake up from surgery I will have a tube down my throat to help me breathe, 2 tubes in my chest to drain chest fluid, and a catheter.

As I recover I may have neck, back or leg pain.

As I recover I have to do deep breathing and coughing exercises, even though it will hurt a lot. I have do deep breathing, then a big cough. As I do this, I have to hold a pillow on my incision to support it. Nasty.

Oh, and as a final kick...I will probably be constipated after surgery and need a laxative. One of the prerequisites for being discharged from the hospital is that I have to poop before I go. Lovely. Sorry to talk about poop...

Now you can understand why I am so freaked. And the things listed here are not nearly all the things I read about in the nice little package. Sigh...what am I getting myself into??